A letter to the single Christian girl on Valentine’s Day

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Dear beloved,

First of all, I want to remind you that you are just that, God’s beloved. He delights in you just as you are. In the middle of your messy life, when you don’t have makeup on and hair done, when you get a bad grade on a test or fail to meet someone’s expectations once again, God still delights in you. Before I get into the singleness, I just want to remind you that you are dearly loved by God so much more than you will ever be loved by a godly man.

But I know you are probably lonely. That’s probably why you clicked on this letter. It’s Valentine’s Day, which means you probably went to school or work today and were surrounded by huge bouquets of flowers being delivered, boxes upon boxes of chocolate, lots of opened love letters, and maybe a few teddy bears, as well. The couples around you were rejoicing in the gifts they received from their significant other, while us single girls watched from a distance, saddened by the fact that we received nothing.

However, did we actually receive nothing?

Or did we wake up today with another beautiful day and abundant blessings the Lord has given us?

I don’t know about you, but I know that I have way too many blessings to be thankful for rather than being saddened by a relationship with a guy that I do not have. I have beautiful friendships, family members who love me, and most importantly, a God who delights in me every second of my life.

A lot of times, we focus on the one thing that we don’t have rather than the many beautiful blessings we do have. We think that in order to be complete, we must find our other half. I have shocking news for you, you are whole just as you are. You are a “fearfully and wonderfully made” individual who is wholly and fully capable of doing amazing things for God’s kingdom without a man by your side (Psalm 139:14). Men and women were made to complement each other, not complete each other.

With that being said, please do not let singleness keep you from the abundance of life and fullness of joy that God promises you. 

We may feel like we need a boyfriend. I know I have felt like that a lot recently because it seems like everyone I know is in a committed relationship, and I want someone to go on cute dates with and tell me they love me. But we have a relationship that we need to find complete contentment in before we should even think about wanting one with a man. We first need to find contentment in our relationship with Jesus Christ.

Christ died to give us contentment, fulfillment, and hope. It’s convicting to think about how many times I have boldly rejected Christ’s offer of these amazing gifts for my own selfish desires. But when we are truly in Christ, we no longer need to worry about not “finding the one.” We already have the One. And if God so chooses to bring a human being into our lives to do ministry with, then so be it. But our heart’s deepest desire should be to know Christ more intimately, not to get intimate with someone of the opposite gender.

“God did not create us ultimately to enjoy marriage or sex. He created us to enjoy him.” 

Instead of wallowing in sadness this Valentine’s Day, use this day as a time to pursue our Creator. If you pursue a more satisfying relationship with him, he will fulfill the longing in your heart for a man when the time is right.

“Take delight in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart.”  – Psalms 37:4

Sincerely,

A single Christian girl striving to find contentment in the Lord


For another amazing article on singleness and to see where I got some of my inspiration for this post, read this!

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